I’m No Good
Honestly, I am absolutely no good to anyone, including myself when I let myself be the pinball marble in this game of life.
Running my own business means that I have things that have to be done daily, even when on holidays or I risk falling behind & ending up in a place of overwhelm; this time can be difficult to carve out in some situations because of the incredible misperception surrounding the demands of entrepreneurship… (but that’s another musing for another time). Of course this can happen in my home & personal life as well - not keeping up with the banking or even the laundry.
But it’s not those Gotta-Do Lists that I’m talking about …
It’s those little things I do just for me…The small daily practices that have evolved over time through study, experience & coaching (yip, coaches need coaches too) that help me stay grounded & centered in my values - the shiny marbles in my bucket that keep the sparkle inside me alive.
It’s easy when I’m at my own life-pace, when the calendar, the weather and the world around me all play nice but let's be honest … How often does life go THAT smoothly!?
Whether it's a series of chaotic misadventures; an extended business event where I need to be ‘on’ all the time or something more personal that's just loads of fun with people I care about …
I’ve recently realized (again!) how easily I will still tell myself that it's ok to let my bucket fill up with the needs and wants of others, leaving no space for my own shiny marbles (is this sounding familiar?)
There's no malice involved, no one is actively trying to suffocate my sparkle. Why would they do that? (if they are, they don't belong in my bucket - another musing for a different time.) But, because my daily practices tend to be flexible & small they can appear trivial to others &, because I tend to be a high energy extravert, when I need some introspective & uninterrupted time it can appear selfish or anti-social.
So, rather than suffering the discomfort of explaining or justifying my needs (or invoking the dreaded “No” ) in order to make the time for my daily needs, I just don’t do them. And here I am once again what a mess it makes of things!
It’s not about control over situations, and certainly not about controlling others- it’s about staying true to myself.
The fact is that it’s MY bucket of marbles and I am responsible for what goes in it.
When I don’t take that responsibility seriously I'm not only denying myself what I KNOW I need, I’m also teaching the people around me how to treat me.
Letting those sparkling marbles get tucked under a blanket of ‘shoulds’ is the path right back into those old patterns of letting myself suffocate in a slimy mess of perfectionism … which only ever leads to exhaustion and resentment… and then I’m no good to anyone … especially myself.
These small practices are so important to my life and health that I simply cannot afford to let them slide!
Taking alone time to recharge doesn’t have to make sense to anyone else - Here are some examples of things I do to keep from being the pinball … What are some of yours?
small meditation moments throughout the day; quiet moments alone in nature; going for a drive; reading; keeping up with a fav podcast; relaxing with my language lessons; planning ahead so I can breathe later; exercise; music … writing these musings to you.
Always Make Space For The Shiny Marbles In Your Bucket!
It never turns out well for the marble in the pinball machine!
